The End of a Great Week and a Beginning of a New One!

This week has certainly been one of the most phenomenal experiences of my life. People coming together to discuss theology from all over the world- it does really get much beter than that. This past week we have engaged in conversations about Poverty and Wealth, Disaster and Creation, Christian Ethics and Worship and Spirituality. It has been absolutely amazing. We have class from Monday to Thursday and on Friday we went to a cultural centre where we got to paint local art, make batiks, and plant a rice field. The rice field in particular proved to be such fun. It was a rather muddy experience without much reprieve from the heat. We were able to ride on the back of a make-shift rig attached to 2 water buffalo who drag a grate around in circles to level off. the fields to plant the rice. Awesome! Yesterday we went to visit a community affected by a mudslide. It was fascinating listening to their perspective on what we would define as a disaster. The community is located on the side of the Merapi mountain which is an active volcano that erupted just a few months prior. Much of the mud that came down after a particularly hard rain was the ash that had settled around the mountain. We were greeted and addressed by local church leaders and an Indonesian man doing his PH.D. in local Indonesian culture. What was so interesting about this talk was their perspective of the mudslide. They told us that they believe that prior to an eruption, the mountain is cooking in preparation for a wedding. The wedding occurs when the eruption happens. What was noted from our group was that they did not seem to focus their attention on blaming God or asking God why this happened. They simply went to work to clean up the left-over wedding festivities. We walked around the village and were able to see the effects that mud, stones and water can have. A friend and I decided to go into an abandoned building. On the floor, below a small fill of stiff sand was beautifully colour tile. On the wall were plaques of Islamic prayer. It is hard to describe the feelings standing seeing the beauty in the destruction. What challenged me was my instinct to question God first, even though I had just heard the locals do the exact opposite. I think I will still need some time to reflect on this one a bit further. UP next, another exciting week of theological studies!

The beginning of a Wonderful Experience

It is all strangely familiar; the sights, the smells, the buildings. There is one thing, though, that has been a new shock to the system-the humid heat. I have basically sweated my way through each day and peel my clothes off at the end of every day. I think my Indonesian room-mate must find me rather amusing with the amount of liquids I seem to be expelling here. It is certainly not the most pleasant thing to experience for my cold North American blood. When I first arrived I really wasn’t sure if I was going to be able to deal with the heat. I am a fairly stubborn person and so it was a challenge for me to accept that this heat might get the better of me. I have stayed happy and healthy and we’ve had a great time learning coping methods here together. Apparently Asia has been having a heat wave so it is even hotter than normal. YIKES! It has been about a week now that I have been in Indonesia and this conference is starting off wonderfully well. We have had some absolutely amazing discussion on the church’s place in issues such as Poverty and Wealth as well as Calvinist Theology and inter-cultural Spirituality. I was misinformed when I thought there would only be 30 people from across the world. There are actually 70 people in attendance here and I have met some truly inspiring people. Our daily schedule starts with breakfast at 7am and then community worship at 8. Then, we get onto the sticky buses and travel to the school to have our morning class from 9:30-11:30. We come home for lunch and then have another class in the afternoon. Everyone is taking 2 courses and then we are divided for our afternoon courses. I am taking Poverty and Wealth as well as the theology of Creation and Disaster. Fascinating! On Saturday a small group of us decided to make our way to one of the local beaches. I had forgotten how much I miss travelling with local people on various forms of transportation. This particular beach had blackened sand from the volcano. We did not go swimming as the undertow was too strong but it was nice to get to know some people better. Unfortunately, as soon as I arrived in Indonesia my computer decided not to work. I will do my very best to write as often as I can. Blessings, Margaret

The Privilege of Witnessing Dying

We all want to be present when a new life has come into the world. We all want to see and hold this new baby and share in celebration with the new parents. It is a time when people experience sheer joy. We rejoice and declare the new life everywhere we go and seem to instantaneously possess such love we’ve never known before. Birth is one of the two most significant marks of our lives. We are promised very little from the time we are born but we all know that someday we will die. What about those moments when you witness the last breath of a person’s life? I’ve been working as a Volunteer Pastoral care-giver at the local hospital for a few weeks now and have been witness to people in the process of dying. The first person I visited was coming to the very end and I left the hospital with a deepened sense of the mark that they had left on me. I am marked by my birth, my siblings and every other person who has a significant place in my life, but never have I ever been so acutely aware of the mark that this relative stranger’s dying-process has left on me? The experiences I’ve had at the hospital, caring for those near and after death, have marked me. Nicolas Wolterstorff wrote a book called “A Lament for a Son” where he expresses how the death of his son marks everything in his life. This book writes of the raw, dirty, gritty path through grief that we do not experience openly in society. When I lived in Kenya, death was far more ‘common’ than it is here. What I mean by this is that death is far more visible. It is not hidden behind sanitized doors and it is not swept away immediately after a short ceremony. Funerals can last hours and when a person dies, the entire community is made aware. Wails and moaning can be heard from far away. As upsetting as it is to witness such open grief, I wonder If there is something to it that provides healing. The community gathers around the grieving family and they have a vigil. People will pray for days and days before the service without leaving the house of the deceased. Even though each of these unique situations are very different I recall being immersed in a deep feeling of gratitude and privilege. It is a privilege to be present during the last stages of life, just as it is to be at the beginning. When we look at the themes of birth and death we often see them as a gain and a loss; life is given through birth and taken through death. I have come to look at it in a more cyclical fashion; the journey of life began at a time that we have yet to completely comprehend, it begins in a place that we understand and then it returns back to the place it began. I believe that it is in the witness of those left behind that we find the great gift, like the witness of a birth, of a life returning back to where it came from.

A Reflection on Mother's Day

I’ve been reflecting a great deal this past week over a conversation that happened over Facebook. For those of you who do not know what Facebook is, it is an online community where people can post interesting items or thoughts as well as pictures. People can put in some personal information if they wish. This conversation happened around Mother’s Day and someone posted on their page that God is not a Mother. I, being who I am, decided that I would put my two senses in. I generally tend not to engage in deep theological conversations via the computer as I think that much is lost in the colour of conversation between two or more people. However, this is what I said: To express God as a 'not' is rather limiting of God. Yes, God is not evil and God is not sin, but God is so much more than what is possible for us to imagine. Ancient Greek translations of the Holy Spirit use the word "Pneuma" which is a feminine word. The same applies to the Holy Spirit described as "Sophia"- feminine form of wisdom. Therefore, if God is all-in-one (the Trinity) and feminine words are used to describe God, I think it is quite appropriate to use a term 'Mother' to describe a certain characteristic of God. It is not limiting in any way. It is simply a way for humans to begin to understand the magnitude of God. The conversation that ensued was based around the fact that Jesus taught us to prayer “Our Father who art in heaven…” thus it is not possible for us to believe that God could also be Mother. After I explained that in the Old Testament God was actually referred to in both female and male terms, it was expressed that perhaps people may get too caught up in the anthropological and historical aspects of God, and in this point I think they are quite right. They were not convinced by my argument of the femininity of a noun was a way of expressing God. I have been thinking about this for the past week and I thought it would be interesting to reflect on it in this blog post. As I write this I am listening to “Jesus Christ the Apple Tree” which is a personal favourite hymn. I think that it is interesting that we can apply metaphors such as the Tree of Life, Rock, Bread of Life, Fountain, Root, and many others as a means of expressing God. What is unique about all of these metaphors? They have been personified. None of these items have life in the human-sense. They have been given life-like features as a means to help people understand the magnitude to God’s abilities, love, and presence in the world. Christians do not seem to have a strong dislike of describing God with things that do not have life in the human sense, yet they are adamant that God cannot be Mother. For fair comparison purposes, we have human-inspired metaphors such as King, Ruler, Offspring, Rabbi, and Messiah, all of which have male attachments. This is the wonder of language and life; often we do not have the words to describe the intricate beauty or complexity that we encounter so we use a measure of words to help us begin to understand it. So, back to my original question: what can’t we understand God as Mother? What is so wrong with that? As the Bible has been translated over and over into many different languages, somewhere along the lines we lost some of the complexity to describing God. There is even sure representation that Ancient Israelites understood God as/and many gods (gasp!). When patriarchal societies ruled in history past, the Bible began to reflect the ideologies of the time (for some further reading, see this blog post I found http://www.biblewheel.com/forum/archive/index.php?t-2758.html) and feminine descriptions of God were lost. Male understandings of God are not wrong, but then again, neither is the female. As a woman, I found this rather upsetting that people were so against the idea that God could be a Mother. How could God not be a Mother? Both my parents have shown me the ways of God, each in their own wonderful and unique ways. To say that God is not a Mother is the same thing as saying that God is not working in and through my Mother, one of the most loving and caring people I have ever met. If you say God is not a Mother, then how could God have created such a wonderful person in my mother? This may seem like a long jump to this conclusion, but how could God create such a woman in my mother if God is not a Mother as well? I suppose that this hit me rather close to home because someday I hope to be a mother myself. I hope to work with God, using my body to create life and raise it in that same love. I believe that God created me in God’s motherly image to be a future mother. I think this is where it ultimately comes down to; we are made in God’s beautiful and perfect image. That does not mean that we are perfect, by any means, but that God must be all things to all people in order to create such originality. In God the Mother’s image my mother, grandmother, aunt and every other mother today and time past is made in that beautiful image. In a way, they act as metaphors of God, just like the words we use to describe God. It is through and with them that I learn more about God’s love, compassion and kindness every day. I love the image that Paul uses in 2 Corinthians 3, that we are the letters of Christ where he writes “You are our letter, written in our hearts, known and read by all humans; being manifested that you are a letter of Christ, cared for by us, written not with ink but with the Spirit of the living God, not on tablets of stone but on tablets of human hearts. Such confidence we have through Christ toward God. Not that we are adequate in ourselves to consider anything as coming from ourselves, but our adequacy is from God, who also made us adequate as servants of a new covenant, not of the letter but of the Spirit; for the letter kills, but the Spirit gives life.” Beautiful! We are the letters in the image of God! There is no need of a letter of recommendation for our place with God! Therefore, whether I use the term God my Mother or God my Father or God The Tree of Life whose “fruit doth make my soul to thrive, It keeps my dying faith alive; Which makes my soul in haste to be With Jesus Christ the apple tree” –Jesus Christ the Apple Tree. Amen

T'is the Season of...Epiphany

I have been contemplating over the 'after-Christmas' season that seems to drift into a world of resolutions, lifestyle changes, and starting afresh. In the yearly cycle of the church this is the time of the Epiphany. The root of the word comes from the greek word epiphaneia, which literally translates to 'manifestation'. After the Twelve Days of Christmas, on January 6th, the Epiphany is celebrated. Perhaps it is simply my own experience but I find that the Season of the Epiphany is often forgotten in the hubub of the New Year. This is very strange, since it occupies such a large space of time in the church calendar from January 6th to Ash Wednesday. The Epiphany is intrinsically linked to the birth of Christ. As we know, Jesus was born in manger to a young mother but the world had yet to realize what had happened. No one knew that a child was born who who would change the face of humanity forever. The Epiphany celebration the recognition of the world realizing who Jesus is. It is a season of realization. Although I do not know the history behind the New Year's Resolution I can understand it in reference to the season of the Epiphany; realizing something is different. So, what is different? Every year the world spends billions of dollars on gifts during the 'Holiday Season'. Decemeber has become known as a time to give and spend with family. The word Christmas is band in certain references. If this is all happening, where does the Epiphany fit in? How can the Epiphany be if there isn't even a recognition of Christmas. Perhaps this is exactly why the Epiphany is needed. When Jesus was born, the world continued on. On one expected that the birth of a baby would affect them in any way. No one would have given much thought to seeing a pregnant woman riding on a donkey. It wasn't until the arrival of the Wise Men that Jesus' identity became known. Jesus' significance was never the question. The question was, how long would it take the world to realize what had happened? This is the season of Epiphany! Praying for and recognizing the reality of Christ. What will be your New Year's Resolution this year? Mine? I pray that Christ be realized in my heart and yours! The anticipation is over. Christ has arrived but now, we can anticipate Christ's manifestation in greater ways this year!

10 Things I learned in the first semester of seminary

I began my Master of Divinity program this September at the Vancouver School of Theology. A part of me wishes I had written down my expectations for school as it would help me fully understand the process of where I have come in just a short three months. I have attempted to document some thoughts on 10 things I learned this semester 1) God is bigger than I imagine. Are you surprised? I hope you aren't. I have learned to begin every class with prayer, requesting that God show me something new about God's character. Do you know that I was never disappointed 2) I have a strong voice and it is okay to use it. There were several situations in which I voiced my opinion regarding something that had been said or done in class. Afterwards I questioned whether or not I should have opened my mouth. I have come to realize that seminary is also a place that encourages you to develop your own 'theological voice' so-to-speak. God gave me an articulate, strong voice so I give it to God to use accordingly. 3) Seminary is not simply about studying God, it is also about understanding yourself and what you think. My favourite class this semester was called Constructive Theology. In essence it was the study of the academics or ideologies of theology and how to apply them in practical ways. The further we delved into the various theologians and their philosophies the more I realized that this course was to help you formulate what it is, exactly, that you believe. 4) Taking a Sabbath is crucial. There is a reason why Jesus says in Mark 2:27 that "The Sabbath was made for man, and not man for the Sabbath". There may be times in life where there is not enough time in the day but the trauma of continued busy-ness is far more draining. The gift of a Sabbath is to be enjoyed and cherished. Use it! 5) Community is important but prayer is crucial. Having a body of fellow believers surround you is very important to the life of a seminarian. You are constantly being bombarded with new and strange ideas. The community provides you with an outlet of venting and sharing as you sift through the challenges of academic processing. Prayer, however, can often get overlooked. When one is surrounded by 'God-talk' all day it is easy to forget the need for direct communion with God. Prayer is crucial! 6) Everyone carries hurt with them, including seminarians. I think one thing that surprised me the most was the challenge and hardship which was faced amongst some individuals. We must never forget that no one is perfect and everyone carries hurts. The challenge is not to let those hurts affect the way you treat others. 7) Being kept from sleep is not necessarily a bad thing. Remember how I mentioned the importance of prayer above? Well, I am a firm believer that God will do anything to get your attention, including waking you in the middle of the night for no apparent reason. Listen to God and pray. 8) Quiet time is not as bad as it seems. Being still is something that God has encouraged since ancient Biblical times. "Be still and know that I am God..." Take time everyday to be quiet and let your mind go where it pleases. 9)Seminaries, like the church are not perfect. Do not expect them to be. They are filled with people who are human. Have mercy and love for seminary schools as a place where people are welcomed to challenge the status-quo. 10) Jesus doesn't care whether I get an A+ or a C-. Jesus simply asks that I try.

Summer Renovations

As a result of my time of deputation traveling across Canada, I felt God's call to return home and make arrangements to move out to BC. This past summer I spent a wonderful 3 months on Vancouver Island working for one of the most loving congregations I have ever been apart of. I was loved, accepted, and given freedom to move where the Holy Spirit directed. The church is going through a transition of finding a new minister and I was blessed to experience their growth and willingness to enter into a new and exciting challenge. At the end of the summer I was given a gift. Among other things, I had organized a small day camp. The theme of the camp was "Citizens of the World" Each day the children learned something new about the environment, the local community, or the world. The hope of the camp was to encourage children to look outside of themselves for a moment and see God in other people and places. They were encouraged to develop their self-worth and value by being exposed to what they are capable of doing. Throughout the week the children worked on various art projects and one particular project was to draw on a pieces of fabric which was to be amalgamated into a quilt for the church as a thank you gift. As the week came to an end the fabric pieces grew in colour and quantity. I knew that a group of women were coming together to put the quilt together so I was very excited for the following week's service when it would be unveiled. I walked into the sanctuary the following week and there it was. The most beautiful quilt I had ever seen. The children were so proud of it and I of them. I had agreed to help with the children's time during the service and it was at that time when it was to be presented to the congregation. My friend and I had rehearsed a few times what we would be saying during the children's time. Finally, it came time to present the quilt to the church and my friend turned to it hanging on the way. She began by saying "The children of Comox Valley day camp made this quilt as a thank you to the church for letting us come here." She stopped and a few children giggled. She continued on and said "But it isn't for the church, is it?" At this point I was thoroughly confused because the entire congregation said simultaneously "Noooooooo!". As we had had a rather thorough rehearsal of what was to be said, the fact that she was ad-libbing completely threw me off and I wasn't able to keep up. I stood there looking at her rather confused. The next thing I knew, she turned to look at me and said "It's for you, Margaret!" To try and put into words how I felt in that moment is simple; I felt flabbergasted. I didn't know what to say or do. I just stood there looking at my friend. For those of you who know me, you know that it is a rare moment when I do not have something to say. This was one such rare moment. That afternoon, I came home and went quietly to my room where I shut the door, sat on my bed, and promptly began to cry. My tears were tears of sheer joy. Many difficulties had arisen out of my time overseas but, had I not followed God's call to go to Kenya, I would have never experienced this summer of growth, challenge, freedom and love in Comox. Thanks be to God for God is good.