T'is the Season of...Epiphany

I have been contemplating over the 'after-Christmas' season that seems to drift into a world of resolutions, lifestyle changes, and starting afresh. In the yearly cycle of the church this is the time of the Epiphany. The root of the word comes from the greek word epiphaneia, which literally translates to 'manifestation'. After the Twelve Days of Christmas, on January 6th, the Epiphany is celebrated. Perhaps it is simply my own experience but I find that the Season of the Epiphany is often forgotten in the hubub of the New Year. This is very strange, since it occupies such a large space of time in the church calendar from January 6th to Ash Wednesday. The Epiphany is intrinsically linked to the birth of Christ. As we know, Jesus was born in manger to a young mother but the world had yet to realize what had happened. No one knew that a child was born who who would change the face of humanity forever. The Epiphany celebration the recognition of the world realizing who Jesus is. It is a season of realization. Although I do not know the history behind the New Year's Resolution I can understand it in reference to the season of the Epiphany; realizing something is different. So, what is different? Every year the world spends billions of dollars on gifts during the 'Holiday Season'. Decemeber has become known as a time to give and spend with family. The word Christmas is band in certain references. If this is all happening, where does the Epiphany fit in? How can the Epiphany be if there isn't even a recognition of Christmas. Perhaps this is exactly why the Epiphany is needed. When Jesus was born, the world continued on. On one expected that the birth of a baby would affect them in any way. No one would have given much thought to seeing a pregnant woman riding on a donkey. It wasn't until the arrival of the Wise Men that Jesus' identity became known. Jesus' significance was never the question. The question was, how long would it take the world to realize what had happened? This is the season of Epiphany! Praying for and recognizing the reality of Christ. What will be your New Year's Resolution this year? Mine? I pray that Christ be realized in my heart and yours! The anticipation is over. Christ has arrived but now, we can anticipate Christ's manifestation in greater ways this year!

10 Things I learned in the first semester of seminary

I began my Master of Divinity program this September at the Vancouver School of Theology. A part of me wishes I had written down my expectations for school as it would help me fully understand the process of where I have come in just a short three months. I have attempted to document some thoughts on 10 things I learned this semester 1) God is bigger than I imagine. Are you surprised? I hope you aren't. I have learned to begin every class with prayer, requesting that God show me something new about God's character. Do you know that I was never disappointed 2) I have a strong voice and it is okay to use it. There were several situations in which I voiced my opinion regarding something that had been said or done in class. Afterwards I questioned whether or not I should have opened my mouth. I have come to realize that seminary is also a place that encourages you to develop your own 'theological voice' so-to-speak. God gave me an articulate, strong voice so I give it to God to use accordingly. 3) Seminary is not simply about studying God, it is also about understanding yourself and what you think. My favourite class this semester was called Constructive Theology. In essence it was the study of the academics or ideologies of theology and how to apply them in practical ways. The further we delved into the various theologians and their philosophies the more I realized that this course was to help you formulate what it is, exactly, that you believe. 4) Taking a Sabbath is crucial. There is a reason why Jesus says in Mark 2:27 that "The Sabbath was made for man, and not man for the Sabbath". There may be times in life where there is not enough time in the day but the trauma of continued busy-ness is far more draining. The gift of a Sabbath is to be enjoyed and cherished. Use it! 5) Community is important but prayer is crucial. Having a body of fellow believers surround you is very important to the life of a seminarian. You are constantly being bombarded with new and strange ideas. The community provides you with an outlet of venting and sharing as you sift through the challenges of academic processing. Prayer, however, can often get overlooked. When one is surrounded by 'God-talk' all day it is easy to forget the need for direct communion with God. Prayer is crucial! 6) Everyone carries hurt with them, including seminarians. I think one thing that surprised me the most was the challenge and hardship which was faced amongst some individuals. We must never forget that no one is perfect and everyone carries hurts. The challenge is not to let those hurts affect the way you treat others. 7) Being kept from sleep is not necessarily a bad thing. Remember how I mentioned the importance of prayer above? Well, I am a firm believer that God will do anything to get your attention, including waking you in the middle of the night for no apparent reason. Listen to God and pray. 8) Quiet time is not as bad as it seems. Being still is something that God has encouraged since ancient Biblical times. "Be still and know that I am God..." Take time everyday to be quiet and let your mind go where it pleases. 9)Seminaries, like the church are not perfect. Do not expect them to be. They are filled with people who are human. Have mercy and love for seminary schools as a place where people are welcomed to challenge the status-quo. 10) Jesus doesn't care whether I get an A+ or a C-. Jesus simply asks that I try.

Summer Renovations

As a result of my time of deputation traveling across Canada, I felt God's call to return home and make arrangements to move out to BC. This past summer I spent a wonderful 3 months on Vancouver Island working for one of the most loving congregations I have ever been apart of. I was loved, accepted, and given freedom to move where the Holy Spirit directed. The church is going through a transition of finding a new minister and I was blessed to experience their growth and willingness to enter into a new and exciting challenge. At the end of the summer I was given a gift. Among other things, I had organized a small day camp. The theme of the camp was "Citizens of the World" Each day the children learned something new about the environment, the local community, or the world. The hope of the camp was to encourage children to look outside of themselves for a moment and see God in other people and places. They were encouraged to develop their self-worth and value by being exposed to what they are capable of doing. Throughout the week the children worked on various art projects and one particular project was to draw on a pieces of fabric which was to be amalgamated into a quilt for the church as a thank you gift. As the week came to an end the fabric pieces grew in colour and quantity. I knew that a group of women were coming together to put the quilt together so I was very excited for the following week's service when it would be unveiled. I walked into the sanctuary the following week and there it was. The most beautiful quilt I had ever seen. The children were so proud of it and I of them. I had agreed to help with the children's time during the service and it was at that time when it was to be presented to the congregation. My friend and I had rehearsed a few times what we would be saying during the children's time. Finally, it came time to present the quilt to the church and my friend turned to it hanging on the way. She began by saying "The children of Comox Valley day camp made this quilt as a thank you to the church for letting us come here." She stopped and a few children giggled. She continued on and said "But it isn't for the church, is it?" At this point I was thoroughly confused because the entire congregation said simultaneously "Noooooooo!". As we had had a rather thorough rehearsal of what was to be said, the fact that she was ad-libbing completely threw me off and I wasn't able to keep up. I stood there looking at her rather confused. The next thing I knew, she turned to look at me and said "It's for you, Margaret!" To try and put into words how I felt in that moment is simple; I felt flabbergasted. I didn't know what to say or do. I just stood there looking at my friend. For those of you who know me, you know that it is a rare moment when I do not have something to say. This was one such rare moment. That afternoon, I came home and went quietly to my room where I shut the door, sat on my bed, and promptly began to cry. My tears were tears of sheer joy. Many difficulties had arisen out of my time overseas but, had I not followed God's call to go to Kenya, I would have never experienced this summer of growth, challenge, freedom and love in Comox. Thanks be to God for God is good.

A unforgettable man.

There is a man who has been taking over my thoughts lately. Now before you all get ahead of yourselves, he isn't what you are thinking. I have never even met him before but I saw him. Isn't it just incredible how one glimpse has the ability to alter your day or even your life?
This man that I saw for maybe a grand total of 2 minutes will forever occupy a place in my mind.
The brief moment happened on a very cold day while driving in downtown Vancouver. A friend and I were driving through the 'rich and famous' shopping area in downtown Vancouver which just so happens to be right next to the infamous downtown east side. The downtown east side of Vancouver is one of the oldest neighbourhoods. It was also coined by the Globe and Mail as "Canada's Poorest Postal Code". Drugs, alcohol and prostitution are in high exercise. With the drug problem being as it is the infection rates of HIV are also at an alarming high.
A friend and I were on our way to meet an individual who works at First United Church in the heart of the area. Here the entire church, including the sanctuary, have been converted into a shelter where no person is ever turned away.
This opportunity to witness such love and care just as Jesus would have, was so invigorating for me. Please don't misunderstand me, seeing such poverty and hurting people is never easy but on the other hand I felt a connection here in this area because it reminded me of my time in Kenya. It reminded me of what I loved doing while I was there. It was a community of broken people all working together. Community...this is something I have felt was missing in my life since I returned from Kenya. I felt it there.
Anyways, back to this mystery man. As I said above, I didn't meet him, nor do I know his name but I can tell you what I do know about him. He is strong,courageous and desperate. I first noticed him because he didn't seem to fit with the other professionals and high-class shoppers around him. He was sitting on the frozen ground with his head lowered and holding a sign. The sign simply read "HIV+ and Hungry Clean and Sober". That's all. To any other passerby it may have been disregarded. That day it was noticed.
We turned the corner and I really wanted to capture this situation in a photo. I took a picture which you can see above that specifically does not show his face. His face is not what defines this situation but the title of his sign.
As the day went on I kept thinking about this man. I wondered if anyone had stopped to help him. I wondered if anyone cared.
If I had stopped to talk to him I would have said two things 1) I am so overwhelmingly impressed by your courage to be so open with your HIV status and 2) I am sorry you have to state that you are clean and sober in order to receive.
This got me thinking even more. Why is it that so many people have decided that they will not give food or money to the homeless? If a person has a drug or alcohol problem does that mean that they are no longer entitled to food or shelter?
I know what the arguments are. "Well, they will just spend it on drugs or alcohol if I give them money", so I have a suggestion for those of you who may think that. Take 5 minutes out of your day and go buy them some food or talk to them for a while. How many of you would even dare to touch them, or give them a hug?
Challenged by my own thoughts we tried to find him after our tour. We did not find him again but another man enjoyed some Chinese food on his behalf.
My challenge from this post is to check your thoughts(this goes for me as well). As a Christian I am told never to judge another person. I am only called to love.

On Deputation

I can't remember the last time I logged onto my blog to post anything. Well, that should change immediately...
I just returned from a month long speaking tour about my work in Kenya. Isn't it funny how you can often force yourself to think one thing and then God totally changes you to think another? Well, that is what happened while I was away from home, yet again.
It was a bit challenging preparing to leave on a speaking tour to parts of Canada I had never been before but I found myself meeting people who've struggled through similar issues as I do today. They were good people who are devoted to following their God no matter what. I was encouraged and empowered by their resilience to keep fighting the good fight.
As I was preparing to leave the last leg of my journey in Vancouver I felt an overwhelming sadness come over me. I remember sitting in a jam-packed airport trying to figure this all out. I concluded that I felt a kinship to the people there; that they feel hurts and pains and frustrations as I do but are not giving up. Their mission field is BC which apparently has the lowest church attendance in all of Canada. They love their home and wish it to be better.
I do believe I will end up out there again very soon... more on that later.

The Last one on Kenya

Firstly, I wanted to say to all you fellow Canadians that I have so much
more respect for you. This is a COLD country. Somedays I ask myself how
people can even live here. I suppose the transformation is true. My friend
Jack has decided that I am no longer a Canadian but a Kenyadian! On the
coldest of cold days, I would have to agree.YIKES!

It has been over 3 weeks now that I have been home. It has hard to look
back, at times, on the journey that this year has been. Other times I look
back with nostalgic eyes wishing time would slow down a little. Yesterday I
went through some of my albums on facebook and it made me feel quite
homesick for Nyeri.
A year in Kenya... A year in Kenya... To me it doesn't seem like such a big
deal and I try not to bring it up in conversation if possible. Generally, it
stuns people and I always want people to feel comfortable.
It has been interesting trying to navigate the conversations being back in
Canada. People are so wonderful and want to know so many different things.
I thought that try to answer those questions for you as best as possible.

1) How are you doing?
I am generally doing fine. I thought that there would be more cultural
issues to deal with coming home but I have come to conclude that, because I
spent a year abroad and had the time to 'deal' with the tough issues there,
coming home has been not so challenging. In many ways, coming home has been
such a relief however, there are some things that I have struggled with.
There is a possibility that it just hasn't hit home yet. (Note: this is not
the case for all missionaries. We all have different experiences) . I've
spent time with my friends and family and it has been good to my soul. I've
been loved and welcomed back like no time had passed. I am so blessed. Now,
as I am home I am spending time reflecting, healing and being with God.
People are so kind and very eager to know what is next in my life. When I
first arrived home the jet-lag caused me to not be able to disipher which
way was up, so making a major life decisions was just not to be rushed. This
does segway into my next most common question.

2) What is next for you?
I have decided to accept an offer to begin my Master's of Theology and
International Development at Wycliffe College at the University of Toronto
in January. I was surprised when the acceptance came but after a great tour
of the building I knew that it was for me. I walked in and met the acedemic
counsellor who introduced me to the Principal of the college. He had lived
overseas in Kiswahili land for a few years and so we had a good conversation
in Kiswahili. Later on in the tour I was introduced to a student named
Stephen who is a Kikuyu(the tribe I lived with) from Kenya. We exchanged
greetings in both Kiswahili and Kikuyu. I am not sure who was more excited,
him or I! Those were the deciding 'signs' for me! I will only be going
part-time as I will be continuing my deputation with the Presbyterian Church
until the spring.

3) Do you think you will go overseas again?
Without a shadow of a doubt, yes! As challenging as some of the issues I
have encountered over the year were, I know that they were only a stepping
stone to prepare me for the future. I fell as though I will be back overseas
for an extended period of time at some point in my life. It is hard to
completely answer this question since the decision is ultimately not my own.
I feel as though I will end up somewhere long-term but that my home is and
always will be Canada. Thus, I hope to come back home down to road
(permanently...?!)

Those are just some answers to many questions!

I also wanted to mention to all of you that if you are looking for an
'unconventional' but equally satisfying gift to give this Christmas, send me
an email. I have some great ideas!

Finally, this is the last email that I will be sending to you for this time
period of my life. I cannot put into words how much it has meant to me
having you all behind me in prayer and love. I truly believe in the power of
prayer and, at times, I certainly felt is physical presence around me,
protecting and leading me. You have been a key part of the ministry in Kenya
and around the world moving forward the works and love of Christ. If you
have time, send me an email and let's see if we can catch up! Now that you
have spent a year hearing about me it's about time I hear about you! My
prayer warriors!

September Update

Hello my Canadian friends and family,

October is here already! Yikes!
I am not sure where to start for the month of September. It really flew by. I said goodbye to some good friends who came to visit in the first week and welcomed another. My good friend Leah Terry is here for 2 months to volunteer as a nurse for the community here. She has been a wonderful asset to the organization and a great support and friend to me.
Our Home Based care visits have brought some wonderful surprises and joy. I have mentioned in past emails about Halima, one of our HBC clients. She has been very sick for a long time and towards the end of June, beginning of July I was expecting every Tuesday to walk into her compound to learn that she had died.
Last week we entered the compound and a lady was standing looking at me and smiled. Smiling, she said ‘Wanjiku, how are you?” in Kikuyu. At first I didn’t recognize her. She was a healthy and happy lady. After a moment I realized that it was Halima. She had put on weight and looked radiant. Only months ago she had been so sick and emaciated that it was hard to even look at her. God is so good! Through the centre’s counseling on a proper diet, medication use and hygiene Halima has many solid years ahead of her.
After seeing Halima so happy and healthy it was hard to wipe the smile from my face...
I’d like to tell you about another one of the Home Based care clients, Moses. I have come to love and care for all of the clients as my friends but Moses in particular has taken my heart. He is a very sick middle-aged man who lives alone. His home is in the worst condition of the group and he has a hard time walking due to an opportunistic infection in his legs. I look forward every week to sitting with him for a while and talking. He is a very smart man and has also stolen the heart of the community. Every time I’ve visited him he always has someone else there to see him. Last week we came in to his compound and he was sitting out in the sun enjoying the warmth. Even he looked like he was improving. Moses is not from the Kikuyu tribe but is a Turkana. He is very far from home and yet people love him like he was one of the munyengi (locals). It is wonderful to see people of all tribes working together to care for one another.
One day a few months ago when my mother was here we went to see Moses and found him surrounded by a crowd of people. He was in a great deal of pain and the community had come to literally carry him up the treacherous terrain to the hospital. Old ladies with their canes were coming to carry this man to the hospital. Amazing! After praying for him we called a cab and he was comfortably escorted to and from the hospital surrounded by loving women.
The beginning of October has come rather unexpectedly to be honest. I find myself getting more and more anxious as the days move towards my departure. I will be ending my time with Shauri Yako on October 29th, do a few days of travelling and then return at the beginning of November to say my goodbyes and finish things off. The conflicted feelings are strengthened only when I see amazing people like Halima and Moses. Their lives will continue as I return home as will mine. I could never forget them. Their lives and courage have taught me strength beyond anything I have ever seen in human nature to date. I am forever grateful that they have let me be a witness to their stories.
Many of you may be wondering what I will be doing when I get back in November. At this point I am going to leave you in suspense until I get some confirmation but I know that God wants me around Canada, at least for a little while.
Just a quick update on Mwangi. Myself, Leah and another friend from Canada took him to the doctor’s office to get a physical and check-up. I think he quite enjoyed having 3 white people fuss and worry over him. I gave him some money to get his hair cut and he took quite some time. I remembered someone telling me that street kids often try to run away from structured environments when given the chance since they are not used to discipline. I began to worry and considered over whether or not to go look for him. After about 45 minutes he came sauntering around the corner in typical teenaged style. I remember smiling to myself and trying to fight back my tears because he had truly changed and was really committed to working for a better life. He is a happy and healthy 16 year old boy whose desires to be a surgeon were only strengthened by this day’s adventures.
Leah and I will be travelling to Uganda this week to visit a friend. Please pray for our safe travels and that we can be an encouragement and support there.

Peace and love,

Margaret